i want....

career options:

• surgical: ORLHNS
• medical: gastroenterologist (???)

love:

• danny zucko who swims, loves music and gives me chocolate and mixtapes!

i know i sound like im stuck in the 90s, but i really dig the whole mixtape/mix-cd scene...im quite sure i'd melt....:):)

best songs about love....

im gonna start listing what i think are the best love songs written:

• patti smith (+ springsteen) - because the night
• bryan adams - have you ever really loved a woman
• bon jovi - always
• elvis - can't help falling in love with you
• beatles - love
• bruno mars - just the way you are
• the cure/311/adele - love song

trivia....

how did one kid who hated getting his face wet and another who was allergic to chlorine end up becoming 2 of the greatest champions??

repertoire

music i plan on exploring....

• smashing pumpkins
• hole - i already have 1 cd which i love...
• david bowie's ziggy stardust
• the soundtrack to Singles
• lupe fiasco
• i am giant
  

Daughtry - Rebel Yell (Billy Idol Cover)

now THIS is a cover!!! daughtry rocks idol...awesome....:)

soundtracks i really, REALLY like! :)

1st gig of 2010...

it's 4pm now....
3 hours to go before the doors open..
then i rush in to go as close as humanly possible to the stage....:)

hola PARAMORE!!!! :)

pak uda had an MI early last night....
3VD...85-90% blockage...
PCI x3 on thursday...

insyallah he'll be sweet....

smiles for today....

• yummy lunch + mocha at bar italia with the AT+R crew...:)
• lunch included the yummy ANDY BAKER...:)

smiles for today...

• started the day with andy baker smiling...:)
• spotted the mistake my consultant made - he charted flucloxacillin for my patient with a penicillin allergy!....score one for me! :)
• saw tim elliot at lunch again - he was smiling...:)
• saw VideoEzy guy again!
• got me She's All That!!! - it's Freddie!!!! :):)

this is such a drool-worthy day! :)

smiles for today...

• tim elliot....:) and tom...
• elliot stabler from season2 s.v.u.
• vicky christina barcelona - javier bardem
  
• home on time! :)
  

smiles for today...

• bitch-fest with the registrars...:)
• got my vampire weekend tickets!!! :)
  

smiles for today...

• soundtrack for today - incubus
• finished at 3pm....
• left work at 4pm on the dot! :)
  

smiles for today...

• andy baker
• the dude at VideoEzy
  

qualms of the day...

ANGER is the status quo....
i just feel angry at everything....
though i do smile, i can laugh...
i still also wanna SCREAM!, i wanna hit something/someone...
i wanna cry...i want a hug....i wanna cut....
suddenly that BLADE in my dresser looks soooo very tempting...

add to that, my michael phelps book got ruined - now it'll forever have stains...

ok...think happy thoughts nana....

• errr.....i saw andy baker....:)
• i bought my john mayer tickets...
• vampire weekend will be coming in april! :)
  

hmmm......happy vs PO'd...

i think the status quo remains....

my first code

my patient....
severe MI - i mean - Trop I of 10.80!!!!
and then he arrested - after i was meant to go home...
had to call a code - knowing that he was dead when i got there...
started compressions...team came...we knew it was over....

it sucked...had to face the family - who knew it was coming...

i know i did what i needed to do...i went down the NSTEMI route...
the regs i asked seemed to think so...i think...
but maybe if i got a reg down earlier....maybe something would've changed?
i know objectively, medically, nothing much could be done..
but it sucks..

im not phased by the death bit of things - i mean, it's not the first death i witnessed in front of my eyes...
but yeah...it suddenly feels worse when im the doctor there with responsibilities...

bummer.......*sigh*.....

smiles for today...

• good lunch - finally! :)
• caught up with luke....
  

smiles for today...

• morning flat white
• lunch with andrew + morag
• lunch with visible eye-candies very close-by
• drive home : pixies - this monkey's gone to heaven; 311 - love song
  

smiles for today...

• a colleague helping me out my following up on a request for a patient of his whose care i've only just taken over....
• dvds rented for the week
  
• awesome catch-up dinner at nisha's!!! - great, great indian food with creme brulee and friends! :)

smiles for today...

silversun pickups - soundtrack when driving to and from work...:)
chai latte after my HO ward round....:)

smile for today...

something else that i know will make me smile...

mix-tape / mix-cd

finally something to smile about in the midst of all the chaos in my head....